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Topics: Ethics and Organizational Culture
Ethics
Network:3541



I am sure most of us should have faced this issue at some point in time in our career.

How do you deal with the boss, who always criticizes you, never respects you, shouts at you in front of your team?

How did you tackle this type of bosses?
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Network:15727



It depends on your personality Sripriya. Some people are ok with standing up to that kind of manager, and some are not. If you are the kind of person to stand up to them, then have a face to face chat (one on one) and let them know that this behavior is not acceptable and you want them to respect you, otherwise you will need to escalate things. If you are not one to confront them, then go to HR or their manager. Now this is assuming that there is an appropriate HR process in place, or a manager above them who is willing to listen and also doesn't accept this kind of behavior. Unfortunately, in many organizations there are managers who can get away with this because there is no accountability.

I just posted a blog related to this topic:

https://www.projectmanagement.com/blog-pos...Great-Pretender

In my own experience, I take the direct confrontation path. I have sat with my direct managers (in my 30 year career) and let some know of unacceptable behavior, and in one case, told them while they are an effective manager at getting people to deliver, their "leadership style sucks" and then gave them the list of examples why. This doesn't always go down too well, but hey, if you can dish it out, you need to also be able to take it on the chin.
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1 reply by Sripriya Narayanasamy
Apr 02, 2019 12:40 AM
Sripriya Narayanasamy
...
Sante, Thank you very much for your valuable comments.

I am sure they will be very helpful for anybody who goes through this situation
Network:1400



Sripriya -

To add to Sante's feedback, one way or another you will need to tackle this issue. At a bare minimum, have a 1:1 meeting with the boss and make sure they are aware as to how their behavior makes you feel and see how willing they are to explore other approaches of expressing their concerns.

If that doesn't result in any improvement, it depends if they are crossing HR policy lines. If so, then pursue the issue through HR but realize that the company will focus on protecting themselves in 99% of cases so you might be accelerating your departure.

Kiron
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1 reply by Sripriya Narayanasamy
Apr 02, 2019 12:47 AM
Sripriya Narayanasamy
...
Dear Kiron,

Thank you very much for the valuable information you have provided.

Yes, one on one confrontation is the BEST.

But, the respect you loose with the team because of your boss is too much to handle. Whatever you do will only be a patch you apply, right?

Not, all companies (however big they are) follow the HR policies 100% of the time. The middle managers are always at a risk.
Network:15727



Yes I have been in that 99% before.
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1 reply by Sripriya Narayanasamy
Apr 02, 2019 12:48 AM
Sripriya Narayanasamy
...
Thank you very much for your valuable comments on this topic
Network:1796



Which is the benefit for you to stay in that situation?. If you are there is for a reason.
Network:1067



Sripriya,

First I would like to state that I am sorry you are in this position, understandably there is not much worse than having a "bully" to deal with at work. I am sure like all the other PM colleagues posting their views to you, ultimately you may just have to come to a point whether it is worth staying at this job or not.

I agree with Sante in which it would be best first to use the system (HR or higher management) to try an correct the issue if there are a system to work within.

Given your own title according to your bio, you appear to be quite high up in the ranks per say. Do you feel comfortable enough to discuss the issues with this person?

I wish you all the best in this matter.

Chris
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1 reply by Sripriya Narayanasamy
Apr 02, 2019 12:54 AM
Sripriya Narayanasamy
...
Dear Christopher,

First of all, thank you very much for your concern. Thankfully, I am not currently in the situation. But, I was sometime back.

I have co-authored a Project Management solutions book "Say YES to Project Success" with Karthik Ramamurthy. We are planning for our next book. So, I want to know how people handled these types of problems. I know solutions like this cannot be tailor-made. I am trying to get the best solution possible.

Thank you once again for your time.
Network:116679



I agree with Kiron and Sante - Not sure I can add much but you need to handle this issue one way or another and let them know that their behavior is unacceptable.
...
1 reply by Sripriya Narayanasamy
Apr 02, 2019 12:55 AM
Sripriya Narayanasamy
...
Dear Rami,

Thank you very much for your valuable comments. I really appreciate it.
Network:3541



Apr 01, 2019 3:25 PM
Replying to Sante Vergini
...
It depends on your personality Sripriya. Some people are ok with standing up to that kind of manager, and some are not. If you are the kind of person to stand up to them, then have a face to face chat (one on one) and let them know that this behavior is not acceptable and you want them to respect you, otherwise you will need to escalate things. If you are not one to confront them, then go to HR or their manager. Now this is assuming that there is an appropriate HR process in place, or a manager above them who is willing to listen and also doesn't accept this kind of behavior. Unfortunately, in many organizations there are managers who can get away with this because there is no accountability.

I just posted a blog related to this topic:

https://www.projectmanagement.com/blog-pos...Great-Pretender

In my own experience, I take the direct confrontation path. I have sat with my direct managers (in my 30 year career) and let some know of unacceptable behavior, and in one case, told them while they are an effective manager at getting people to deliver, their "leadership style sucks" and then gave them the list of examples why. This doesn't always go down too well, but hey, if you can dish it out, you need to also be able to take it on the chin.
Sante, Thank you very much for your valuable comments.

I am sure they will be very helpful for anybody who goes through this situation
Network:3541



Apr 01, 2019 5:08 PM
Replying to Kiron Bondale
...
Sripriya -

To add to Sante's feedback, one way or another you will need to tackle this issue. At a bare minimum, have a 1:1 meeting with the boss and make sure they are aware as to how their behavior makes you feel and see how willing they are to explore other approaches of expressing their concerns.

If that doesn't result in any improvement, it depends if they are crossing HR policy lines. If so, then pursue the issue through HR but realize that the company will focus on protecting themselves in 99% of cases so you might be accelerating your departure.

Kiron
Dear Kiron,

Thank you very much for the valuable information you have provided.

Yes, one on one confrontation is the BEST.

But, the respect you loose with the team because of your boss is too much to handle. Whatever you do will only be a patch you apply, right?

Not, all companies (however big they are) follow the HR policies 100% of the time. The middle managers are always at a risk.
Network:3541



Apr 01, 2019 5:11 PM
Replying to Sante Vergini
...
Yes I have been in that 99% before.
Thank you very much for your valuable comments on this topic
...
1 reply by Sante Vergini
Apr 02, 2019 1:00 AM
Sante Vergini
...
You're welcome.
Network:3541



Apr 01, 2019 7:33 PM
Replying to Christopher Leek
...
Sripriya,

First I would like to state that I am sorry you are in this position, understandably there is not much worse than having a "bully" to deal with at work. I am sure like all the other PM colleagues posting their views to you, ultimately you may just have to come to a point whether it is worth staying at this job or not.

I agree with Sante in which it would be best first to use the system (HR or higher management) to try an correct the issue if there are a system to work within.

Given your own title according to your bio, you appear to be quite high up in the ranks per say. Do you feel comfortable enough to discuss the issues with this person?

I wish you all the best in this matter.

Chris
Dear Christopher,

First of all, thank you very much for your concern. Thankfully, I am not currently in the situation. But, I was sometime back.

I have co-authored a Project Management solutions book "Say YES to Project Success" with Karthik Ramamurthy. We are planning for our next book. So, I want to know how people handled these types of problems. I know solutions like this cannot be tailor-made. I am trying to get the best solution possible.

Thank you once again for your time.
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