Vivek Bhatia
Principal| The Bhatia Group
Oakland, Ca, United States
Sadly, being a PM requires one to be better at politics than anyone else. PMBOK refers to it as "stakeholder management". You're going to be the lightning rod, this will happen forever & ever. The right response depends on the company culture, no one answer fits all. In certain cultures, "going high" could be interpreted as "not standing up for yourself" and pulling up documentation to prove your position is the kiss of death. In other company cultures, "standing up for yourself" could be interpreted as "overly aggressive", and "going high" is the only way to save yourself.
Let me give you 2 personal examples from both sides, see which one you're in. I'm not trying to make this thread about me, just trying to use real life examples to paint both extremes to help you visualize what your current state resembles.
A) MANY years ago I was at a very large client with an unhealthy culture. That particular company was known as a dog-eat-dog culture, and the only appropriate response to front or back stabbing was to absolutely destroy the person's skills as compared to yours. (I left that client 9 months later as I had no desire to continue like that.)
In a meeting one of the senior directors, more senior than I was, went after me in front of the VP and another senior director. As in "Please, you're the Program Manager, this is your responsibility, I want to see how you'd handle this". I guess not back-stabbing, rather front-stabbing. My response: I smiled, put my pend down, made sure I could feel the chair on the top middle part of my back. (Old parlor trick to not overreac). The VP started to say something, I put my hand up to indicate "stop", and began with "Are you really sure you want my opinion?" He had no choice but to say "yes", at which point I calmly and low tone of voice eviscerated his department and their inability to meet timelines. The VP complimented me after the meeting, and said "wow even I got scared when you turned to talk to him"
B) At a more recent and much healthier client my credibility was also questioned, although in private and behind my back. I decided a counterpoint would be he said/she said, and my role was to lead everyone regardless of stance. I embraced the negative comments, and told the execs "everything x said is absolutely true. But what they don't realize is z will happen if we attempt to go down his path, this is the less painful road. If you agree, I ask for your support in making sure we stay the course as deviation will be painful."
The senior execs at that company then realized that I wasn't an idiot, wasn't even going to respond at a detail level about the allegations, and that my approach was clearly superior and thought through. And my refusal to even discuss the details demonstrated the confidence that every Project Leader must embody if they want the troops to follow them.
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