Igor ZdorovyakDirector of Projects| ImmunovantFair Lawn, Nj, United States
When stakeholders have difference of opinions. Having EITHER/OR mindset will have a negative result.
As in "You can't have your cake and eat it." It's a proverb meaning you can't have it both ways. If one stakeholder Wins the other Loses. If the second stakeholder Wins than the other Loses. In these scenarios of Win/Lose or Lose/Win in the long run will end up a Lose/Lose.
As a Project Manager I would recommend expending the cake. Getting your stakeholders into a BOTH/AND mindset. As Stephen Covey would say it’s a Win/Win situation. One Wins and the other Wins. BOTH WIN.
What has your experience been in expending the cake? Saving Changes...
5 styles responding to conflict: competition, collaboration, compromise, avoidance, accommodation. "No conflict style is inherently right or wrong, but one or more styles could be inappropriate for a given situation and the impact could result in a situation quickly spiraling out of control." (Kenneth Thomas & Ralph Kilmann developed Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument)
They recommended first try to collaborate with the person. If they refuse, try compromise.
If the person refused both, accommodation, avoidance or competition, all have more cons than pros. (see article)
SO in your situation, I first try to get the people to collaborate, by first finding common ground where they agree. Then I try to in advance, think of part of person A's solution, which, if analyzed from a different unique perspective, might appeal to person B in a way that had not before realized. vice versa.
We have to think like person A. What are their main goals, background, biases? what from person B's solution could solve their problem, appeal to them etc. Then think, same for person B.
Easier said than done. Otherwise, my experience is the more stubborn person wins, which is not fair.
I wish I had asked each person to show me their solution, and demonstrate & explain it verbally to (not just hear it, but also see example VISUALLY). that would have helped me understand their solutions better, and led to better final solution. This is not easy, I have a tough time doing it. Saving Changes...
Sergio Luis ConteHelping to create solutions for everyone| Worldwide based OrganizationsBuenos Aires, Argentina
You have to work to avoid words like "win" and "loose". That is the key. Saving Changes...
Anton OosthuizenSenior Business Analyst / Project Manager| Self EmployedPretoria, Gauteng, South Africa
Igor while I agree that the ultimate goal should be a win/win and that the cake should be expended 'equally' there are many situations where it is just no possible. Opposing views needs to be evaluate on their individual merits and the cake should be expended based on value each opinion will bring. I believe it is not so much how much cake each party gets but rather how the reason behind this is communicated, and understood. My approach has always been to establish a common 'enemy'. There is nothing that brings people together like a shared desire to slay an enemy. While they might still differ on how to do this it does become easier to reach consensus on the weapon than it would be to decide who we want to slay. BTW the enemy that we want to slay is a business problem, not the manager ;) Saving Changes...
Based on experience with working with cross-functional departments, each department is more concerned in meeting its goal than the common project goal. Each department is focus on their respective KPIs.
We learn and understand our differences in perspectives and reconcile the differences, focus on the company's vision, and employed project KPIs. Saving Changes...
John A. WilliamsOwner| JAW Consultancy | The PragmaticionerNootdorp, Zuid-Holland, Netherlands
The underlying question here is "What's in it for me?" Just like in real life, it's all about give and take. To stick to your cake, I find out how much cake would be acceptable for each stakeholder. In the Netherlands, we have the compromise model called the Polder Model. It boils down to, I give you that if you give me this. The beauty is that each stakeholder proclaims themselves the winner. In conclusion, everybody wins. Saving Changes...
Paulo RoqueChartered Civil Engineer, PMP| BECHTELSetubal, Portugal
The ability to effectively manage a conflict often involves exercising our flexibility and creativity in order to find “outside de box” that kind of disruptive solution that adds value to both parties interests, leading to a Win/Win “expanded cake” outcome.
But according to my experience in the heavy civil construction’s arena, when a collaboration (Win/Win) or compromise ( Win/lose or Lose/Lose ) conflict resolution style fails it’s worth reflecting on our BATNA ( Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement ), before opting for an accommodation, avoidance or competition ones. Saving Changes...
As a PM that primarily deals with engineering, there are often competing requirements where improving in one area is detrimental in others based on the fundamental physics. This is where stakeholders often want to sub-optimize their own piece of the puzzle, ignoring the collateral impacts. It's important for people to look at a higher system level perspective and what is best for the project as a whole, rather than what is best for individual functions involved. Saving Changes...
