Riad AlhammoudProject management| LanganAbu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates
Do you think that it is right to resist your project manager when you notice that he is supporting one of employees that he brought to the project more than others or you should be calm and do your work as everything is normal. First scenario may put the project at risk as the PM will never accept to anyone to work against him and most likely the outcome will be negative, in the 2nd scenario - it will be better as at least that you will be in a good relationship with the PM even if you are not happy with what you're doing.
could i have your opinions
please? Saving Changes...
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Sergio Luis ConteHelping to create solutions for everyone| Worldwide based OrganizationsBuenos Aires, Argentina
Perhaps because english is not my first language I misunderstood some but here I come. First of all, there is a law of the Universe, proven and basic, that state: "What resists persists". Second, you are writing two scenarios with two conclusions then the question is: is it what is happening right know or both are part of your own "imagination" or "perception" and the result of you are trying to prevent some situations? It is important to stay clear of that. Reality has to be evaluated as objective as possible and that could be thanks to measure outcomes and objectives achievement. All the project environment will be impacted for that. Saving Changes...
Sergio has some great points, I confess I'm new to the world of professional project management but I do have experience in conflict resolution.
The key factor is you're both working toward a common goal that being the success of the project, if you believe they're potential risks to the project then you should voice them in a manner that shows both class and high level communication.
Having a mindset of working with rather then working for his/her viewpoint. Everything in life can be said but it really factors on how you say things. (wording is important...as they say the pen is mightier then the sword)
Example:
A) I completely disagree, if we don't do X the project will fail
compared to
B) I was reviewing X and found Y and Z were some great points, I'm a little unclear on A and would like to better understand you're methodology (listen more then talk) once he/she presents their view you could lead with I understand and can see the value have you considered (state your concerns)
I don't know if this helps or not but the point I'm trying to make is present your views in a manner that solidifies views via healthy conversation and be sure to voice both the positive and possible concerns in an optic that is set to help and improve on common goal.
Cheers, Saving Changes...
Thomas WalentaGlobal Project Economy ExpertHackenheim, Germany
Riad,
there may be more scenarios as you list.
You observe something (new member, behavior of PM)
then you interpret it (supporting more than others)
which creates a bad feeling about unfairness within you.
Well, your observation could be interpreted in many ways. And may be your PM is unaware of what you observe (we all do things unconsciously). And he most certainly is unaware of your feelings and how you interpret his behavior.
A good way would be to stay calm, and ask your PM for a 1:1 chat. Tell him you are feeling uncomfortable, because you interpreted some behavior you observed from him. Let him think about your observations and tell you his motivation for the behavior.
Always, always remove emotions before tackling a perceived problem (in many cases problems die if emotions leave the room).
This conflict handling is based on the book 'crucial conversations'.
Good luck. Been there, done that.
Thomas
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1 reply by Mayte Mata Sivera
Mar 01, 2021 12:17 PM
Mayte Mata Sivera
...
I was going to propose the same, a 1:1 and a direct conversation is the best approach here.
Saving Changes...
Luis BrancoCEO| Business Insight, Consultores de Gestão, LdªCarcavelos, Lisboa, Portugal
Dear Riad
Very interesting this theme that brought to our reflection and debate
Thanks for sharing
you wrote: "he is supporting one of employees that he brought to the project more than others"
My interpretation is that we are facing a situation of discrimination. If it was the Project Manager who brought this person that he protects to the project, can we say that it is nepotism?
How should a team member react to such a situation? Saving Changes...
there may be more scenarios as you list.
You observe something (new member, behavior of PM)
then you interpret it (supporting more than others)
which creates a bad feeling about unfairness within you.
Well, your observation could be interpreted in many ways. And may be your PM is unaware of what you observe (we all do things unconsciously). And he most certainly is unaware of your feelings and how you interpret his behavior.
A good way would be to stay calm, and ask your PM for a 1:1 chat. Tell him you are feeling uncomfortable, because you interpreted some behavior you observed from him. Let him think about your observations and tell you his motivation for the behavior.
Always, always remove emotions before tackling a perceived problem (in many cases problems die if emotions leave the room).
This conflict handling is based on the book 'crucial conversations'.
Good luck. Been there, done that.
Thomas
I was going to propose the same, a 1:1 and a direct conversation is the best approach here. Saving Changes...
Hanh VuPrincipal Project Manager| solo.ioChurchville, Md, United States
Hi Riad,
I don't think silently resist or silently go long is an ideal course of action.
In a healthy team environment, I think you should be able to approach the PM with your observations and talk about your concerns. The conversation should center around how your project is/would be impacted and the different options available to your team, rather than about how one's feelings is hurt because of the perceived favoritism.
Usually, you would both arrive at a better understand and can be on board with a certain course of action. If not, depending on the severity of your concern, you can THEN go along OR escalate the concern to a person higher on the command chain. Again, I think the focus should be how this affect your team's performance and cohesion. I find that this approach gets me further in my quest to change something. Saving Changes...
There is no problem with that, as long as everything is conducted ethically (specially section of favoritism or fairness). Perhaps try to get the team to "Buy-In" and/or create team charter, so everyone can self evaluate based on contribution to the team and organization at any time (or as needed). Comparing one employee with another is a slippery slope that has no value, better approach is to promote and invest in organizational culture. Stronger the culture, easier to implement change and mitigate conflicts. Saving Changes...
Peter RapinSubject Matter Expect; Project Delivery| Independent ConsultantOntario, Canada
Dad, how come mommy likes Billy more than me?
Mom, how come the coach gives Sam more court time than me?
Mom, how come the teacher gives Johnny better marks than me?
Ever hear these before?
The answer have always been - maybe, maybe not.
Just do your tasks to the best of your abilities, don't expect praise and attention for doing so.
Earn respect by performing.
If its unbearable - go see HR. That's what they are paid to resolve. If it still doesn't work to your expectations, find another job. Saving Changes...
Adela TataruSenior Project Manager| Self EmployedVancouver, British Columbia, Canada
It all depends on what do you mean by supporting a certain employee more than the others.
For your PM maybe having someone that they have already worked with, is easier to understand each other because of the relationship they have previously built. And maybe not having this kind of relationship with the others is what is causing the conflict. In such a case I would be transparent with your PM and seek a one-on-one discussion explaining the fact that you find the situation unfair. He might not be aware of that and it will help him refocus his management style. Also, you might understand his point of view and maybe he can also explain why he feels that this particular employee is in need of more support.
If your PM is acting unethically, I would first seek to know if he is aware of this or not. Once again you might want to discuss it (in a diplomatic way and not let emotions take over the discussion) with him. If this does not help diffuse the situation, then you can reach out to an external party (HR or another manager) to be able to solve the situation.
I would not just take it in and just not say anything. Not being happy about your work environment reflects poorly on project success and it might just build resentment and frustrations that will have a negative impact on your work and well-being. It is not worth it. Saving Changes...
