How Do You Get Rude People to Pay Attention During Meetings?
Laptops and Smart Phones are brilliant innovations. However, when they get into the hands of rude people they can also be extremely aggravating to a project manager. This occurred to me as I looked around the room at multiple meetings I’ve attended and see that many people bring their laptops to check e-mail. Or, they are compulsively looking at their Smart Phones for text messages or just browsing the web. All of this going on while a project manager is attempting to conduct a meeting that needs their input.
Rude.
How do you manage this type of partial and distracted attention at your internal meetings? How do you manage it with your Clients that may be preoccupied with their phones or laptops and not listening to what you have to say? Saving Changes...
William WiliamsProject Manager| W3src ConsultingCanyon, Tx, United States
Before laptops and smart phones, people "doodled" on notepads. In the open and without pen and paper, they drew figures with their boots, shoes, or sandals in the sand. They stare out windows or just blankly off into space. Meetings are generally boring.
So, who's to blame? Do the attendees "owe" the presenter their rapt attention? Does the presenter owe the attendees a roller coaster ride of non-stop thrills and excitement?
The answer is probably a little of both but the issue probably isn't that people are rude. It's probably more a lack of engagement, lack of interest, and little sense of importance.
Perhaps approaching it in that manner might move things forward. Saving Changes...
Taralyn Frasqueri-MolinaSenior Project Manager| Independent ContractorPasadena, Ca, United States
I don't think it's rude to use your digital devices in a meeting.
You may think you've called everyone together to get their input, but what really happens in a meeting is you have 1 or 2 people talking at a time, which leaves several people left out, several people left not contributing, so they will inevitably find some more useful way to spend their time.
You may think you've called a meeting at a good time because everyone was available on the calendar, but what's really happening is that just about everyone had something going on before your meeting, and something will be going on after your meeting. Your meeting isn't the only thing occupying their head space.
PMs really need to look at why we call meetings, what kind of meetings we are calling, what's the purpose, why we invite who we invite, and if a meeting is the absolute best way to impart information or gather information in the first place.
We also need to realized that an empty space on a calendar, really isn't an empty space.
Is a meeting the best way to collect input? I don't think so. Sitting in a room waiting to be engaged is bound to lose anyone's attention.
The meeting you describe sounds like a meeting where there are quite a few people around a table. And to me, more than 5 people (including yourself) is quite a few. You may want to consider having several smaller meetings, in small spaces, that engage your core instead of having one large meeting to try to get everyone's input.
Because you can't get everyone's input all at once.
When I need someone's input I opt for an email or a quick in person visit.
If I need two people to talk business with, then they are the only 2 people I invite to a meeting.
If I have to have a meeting with more than 4 people (including myself) it's for one very specific thing. This meeting is just to talk schedule or just to talk requirements or just for budget. If we all agree to address something off topic, we will, if not, meeting over.
I have found that even if I need to meet for an hour, which is not my preference at all, small meetings are always the best way to go. There is more engagement, less individual downtime, and less opportunity for someone to mentally slink away because they feel no one is paying attention to them. Saving Changes...
Mark CulmerProject Manager| pmlLondon, United Kingdom
Hi
I dont think it is rude - I do it but I do also pay attention where I need to. When I am chairing a meeting, I make sure I take accurate notes and action points and send out straight after the meeting.
It's also important to make sure that you have relevant people at the meeting and that those who do attend are engaged - keep on asking them questions, feedback to engage them, rather than losing them on their PC's / phones.
I wouldn't get to hang up about it, just so long as you got what you wanted from the meeting, people understand what was agreed, then all is fine. Saving Changes...
It may not be rude, it is unacceptable... the meeting is held for a purpose, mobile phones off and unless someone is going to take the minutes using laptop as a tool or present information to the meeting no laptops either. Just before commencing the meeting the Project Manager has every right to ask that mobile phones are off and no laptops admitted... if you dont ask them they will take advantage, if they insist you have the wrong people attending! simply they are not taking you seriously as a professional! Saving Changes...
Most meetings here are phones off and no laptops too. Also, a sign-in sheet is commonly used in my organisation- to state who was present & what area they were representing. That tends to focus people's minds.
As well as all the above, my preferred approach involves shorter and smaller meetings as the most effective ways of engaging people, and I like to make an effort to chair the meeting and make sure everyone has the chance to speak up about issues. And don't forget to provide refreshements!
Saving Changes...
Darren LeadSenior Project Manager| Canada LifeStevenage, United Kingdom
Maybe the blame shouldn’t be on the audience rather on the chair of the meeting. Think of the last time you watched a really good film. How engaged you were with the film. How you watched and listened for the next plot, twist or action to unfold. How quick the time seemed to go. Now think back to a boring film you watched. Did you play with your phone, look at your watch, have a sleep! Did the time seem to drag!
As chair it is up to you to ensure that everyone has a voice and that everyone is engaged. If you see someone not playing attention then ask them their view. They will soon stop doing their little side task and focus back on the meeting. If you get good at this you will see when people are starting to lose focus long before they start using their phone.
Saving Changes...
Wai Mun KooPMO Director| Intergraph PP&MSingapore, Singapore
It is strange that people have little tolerance on people using phone in a theatre than people using phone in a meeting. I guess the difference is 'priority' and 'impact' on others.
We can set ground rules in meetings as long as everyone agree. Whoever has violated the rules will be punished - say buy everyone a drink or sing everyone a song (this will also wake up the sleepy eyes). Saving Changes...
Michelle StronachProject Management and IT Governance Consultant| M.L. Stronach Project Consulting, Inc.Pickering, Ontario, Canada
Also a pet peeve for me. Meetings can be the biggest source of unproductive time if not managed properly. I've seen too many meetings with vague purpose and unnecessary attendees. If meetings are managed correctly, with a clear objectives, agenda and the right people - chances are people will be better engaged and less distracted.
Having said all that, even the best run meeting can have people who can't leave their smart phone's alone.
As a facilitator, I will do as I would anyone looking distracted - ask direct question to the person in question: "Bob, what do you think about what Helen said?" at which time you usually get a .... "aahhh....well, ahhh.... " and after that point Bob usually realizes he has gone astray and that he's been caught.
Or if I am working in an organization where there is a cultural problem, I will specifically ask everyone to turn off their phones. At a lunch meeting, I once saw the meeting facilitator ask everyone to put their phones in front of their plate and said the first person who reaches for the phone pays.... Saving Changes...
Wai Mun KooPMO Director| Intergraph PP&MSingapore, Singapore
For shorter meetings say an hour or so, it is not difficult to enforce ground rules, but for longer meetings like half to a day, it will be challenging to keep people away from their phones and laptops. Michelle did bring up an interesting point - culture. We behave, or tend to behave, in a way in response to others around us. If everyone in the room is serious and somber, we will as we do not like to be the odd one out (there are exceptions to this). So, organization culture plays an important role in this. Saving Changes...
Ravi AnandProject Manager| Fujitsu ConsultingPune, India
Agree with Darren, instead of making a ground rule or forcefully ask some one to pay attention, the better idea is to engage them on meeting discussion, ask their openion, involve everyone in the discussion, and definetly have a break after every one hours ( Depends). Most of the time people are not paying attention if they are not intrested and some time when they feel that they are ignored. Saving Changes...
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