Suck it, Poke it!

 

I believe many of us have this experience where we tried to poke a straw into a packet of drink but no matter how careful we were, the drink just spilled out from the opening. For those who still unable to figure out the reason, this is due to the change in air pressure inside the packet of drink causes by the action of poking a straw into it. I have found out a way to minimize the amount of spill by first sucking through the straw while poking it gently into the packet which surprisingly able to keep the air pressure in balance, thereby preventing the spill.

Yes ‘suck it, poke it’, this is exactly what we should do when we push out changes in organizations. It is very common for us to encounter resistance and push-back in change implementation. When we bump into a wall, we should take a step back and try a different approach instead of keep charging at it with brute force. Just like the way we insert a straw into a packet of drink, we may have to ‘suck up’ to the resistance force first before we ‘poke it’ to forge the changes required. What is the point of winning a battle but losing a war? There is a Chinese proverb “Yi Tui Wei Jin” that says ‘retreat in order to advance’. Sometimes, we just have to do that.

It is natural for people to put up a defense wall immediately if you were to foray into their territories and try to overthrow their strongly-held beliefs and dismantle their long-practiced processes. No one likes changes. People hate to have their comfort zones disrupted. It just gets worse if there is any sentimental attachment in those things that you are taking away from them. Imagine yourself as an evangelist that embarks on a missionary trip to preach Christianity to an aboriginal tribe. If you try to force the concept of Christianity down their throats, you will probably find yourself tied to a tree the next day. You are setting yourself up for failure if you are moving in with a mindset to change people.

No, you don’t change people; you help them to change instead.

In order to achieve that, you must first become part of them. There is an old saying “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.” Indeed very true. Insinuate yourself into the native tribe and be one of them. Nothing works better than being on the same side of the court. Psychologically, you will be able to lower down their defense and gain their trust. I am not saying that you have to change your job or move your office in order to blend into group. But what you do need, at a minimum, is a sympathetic ear that is able to empathize with the plight of others.

Build trust, influence and lead.

Build trust by showing that you understand their problems and care for their well-being. Many a time, people just need a channel for them to voice out their opinions. They want to be heard. Establish that channel. People will trust you more as they share more with you. It is like a self-reinforcing addiction. Once you have gained their trust, people will start to open up to you. They will be more willing to listen and accept your opinions. This is the right moment for you to extend your influence on them. You may make use of this opportunity to explain to them what they need to know and how the change will benefit them. Start slowly. Pace yourself well so that you do not impose too much pressure initially. Remember, you are there to help them to change and not force them to change. Once people have understood your intention and trust that you can help them, you may move on to lead them through the change. Share with them your vision, roadmap, what they need to do and how to do it together with you to achieve the ultimate goal.

Change, is all about the people you are dealing with…