What Coaching Soccer to Kids Taught Me About Leadership

 

by Dave Wakeman

I don’t know soccer as well as a lot of folks because I didn’t grow up with the sport in rural Georgia during the 1980s, but that hasn’t stopped me from coaching a group of 12-year-olds.

This means that I have had to fall back on my skills as a communicator, teacher and student to help these kids learn the game, grow their skills and have fun.

What has been the most important thing? Leadership.

Let me share some lessons.

1. Direction matters: When I first started working with the other coaches, I said, “We need a philosophy, a direction.”

Thus, the “3 Ps” were born: passing, pressure and possession.

Are these the right Ps? Is this the right direction? Does it work all the time?

Maybe. Maybe. No.

What the 3 Ps have highlighted for me is the importance of having a destination and a direction so that you can rally people around where you are heading.

With the kids, we know that our core principles are those 3 Ps—and that we if we focus on them, we are likely to be successful in growing as a team.

As PMs, the same thing plays out when we lay out the idea of “what success looks like” for our team and stakeholders.

2. Communication matters: Coach Jonah says that I am the “rah-rah” coach and the “motivator.” I don’t know if I buy that.

I do know that because I can’t fall back on my soccer skills to demonstrate certain ideas or experience to teach about certain situations, I have to be more thoughtful in the way that I communicate with our team.

What does this mean?

1. First, I need to come up with stories that the kids can relate to when I want to make a point. To get the kids to see the world through my eyes, I have to see the world through a lens of what makes sense to them.
2. Second, since I’m learning everything even now after four or five years, I can be “motivational” because if I can learn all this stuff, the kids certainly can. For you, it might mean taking your team on a journey of discovery. In the world we live in, it’s impossible to have all the answers right there in front of you. But you can learn. Sharing that message can empower you and your team.
3. Third, consistency. We have the same message we deliver regularly:
   • Be a good teammate.
   • Be positive.
   • Let the coaches do the correcting.
   • Pass the ball.
   • Defend.
   • Play the Mustang Way.

This may sound like a lot, but it is really the embodiment of our 3 Ps.

You can use this idea as well by knowing the three or four things you need to get across for your project to be successful—and reinforce the message over and over.

A lesson that I learned in my marketing training that applies everywhere is that it takes many more times hearing a message before it sticks with your audience.

As the PM, you might get tired of the message or explaining things, but you are thinking about a certain aspect a lot more than most people—and you need to recognize that it might be only a small part of someone else’s life or job.

3. Leadership matters: Ultimately, the whole project comes down to the idea that leadership still matters.

With our kids, it isn’t that they want me, Paul or Jonah to be great soccer coaches or players. They need us to be leaders.

They look to us to provide direction, vision and instruction that will help them learn the game, improve and have fun.

In your work, your team members aren’t always looking to you for technical direction. Often, they want you to be a bridge for them to success in the project, growth in their skills, and stronger performance as a team.

It is a simple message, but sometimes you need a group of seventh graders to remind you. What do you think?