Voices on Project Management offers insights, tips, advice and personal stories from project managers in different regions and industries. The goal is to get you thinking, and spark a discussion. So, if you read something that you agree with--or even disagree with--leave a comment.
View Posts By:
Cameron McGaughy
Lynda Bourne
Kevin Korterud
Peter Tarhanidis
Conrado Morlan
Jen Skrabak
Mario Trentim
Christian Bisson
Yasmina Khelifi
Sree Rao
Soma Bhattacharya
Emily Luijbregts
David Wakeman
Ramiro Rodrigues
Wanda Curlee
Lenka Pincot
cyndee miller
Jorge Martin Valdes Garciatorres
Marat Oyvetsky
Past Contributors:
Rex Holmlin
Vivek Prakash
Dan Goldfischer
Linda Agyapong
Jim De Piante
Siti Hajar Abdul Hamid
Bernadine Douglas
Michael Hatfield
Deanna Landers
Kelley Hunsberger
Taralyn Frasqueri-Molina
Alfonso Bucero Torres
Marian Haus
Shobhna Raghupathy
Peter Taylor
Joanna Newman
Saira Karim
Jess Tayel
Lung-Hung Chou
Rebecca Braglio
Roberto Toledo
Geoff Mattie
Recent Posts
Project 2030: Skills We Need to Cultivate Now
The Technical Program Manager: How to Stay Relevant in 2025
5 Things Your Operational Plan Should Do
5 New Project Guardrails for Adaptive Leaders
The Leader's Voice: Respect It, Protect It, and Use It Properly!
Categories
2020,
Adult Development,
Agile,
Agile,
Agile,
agile,
Agile management,
Agile management,
Agile;Community;Talent management,
Artificial Intelligence,
Backlog,
Basics,
Benefits Realization,
Best Practices,
BIM,
business acumen,
Business Analysis,
Business Analysis,
Business Case,
Business Intelligence,
Business Transformation,
Calculating Project Value,
Canvas,
Career Development,
Career Development,
Career Help,
Career Help,
Career Help,
Career Help,
Careers,
Careers,
Careers,
Careers,
Categories: Career Help,
Change Management,
Cloud Computing,
Collaboration,
Collaboration,
Collaboration,
Collaboration,
Collaboration,
Communication,
Communication,
Communication,
Communication,
Communications Management,
Complexity,
Conflict,
Conflict Management,
Consulting,
Continuous Learning,
Continuous Learning,
Continuous Learning,
Continuous Learning,
Continuous Learning,
Cost Management,
COVID-19,
Crises,
Crisis Management,
critical success factors,
Cultural Awareness,
Culture,
Decision Making,
Design Thinking,
Digital Project Management,
Digital Transformation,
digital transformation,
Digitalisation,
Disruption,
Diversity,
Diversity,
Documentation,
Earned Value Management,
Education,
EEWH,
Enterprise Risk Management,
Escalation management,
Estimating,
Ethics,
execution,
Expectations Management,
Facilitation,
feasibility studies,
Future,
Future of Project Management,
Generational PM,
Governance,
Government,
green building,
Growth,
Horizontal Development,
Human Aspects of PM,
Human Aspects of PM,
Human Aspects of PM,
Human Aspects of PM,
Human Aspects of PM,
Human Resources,
Inclusion,
Information Technology,
Innovation,
Intelligent Building,
International,
International Development,
Internet of Things (IOT),
Internet of Things (IoT),
IOT,
Knowledge,
Leadership,
Leadership,
Leadership,
Leadership,
Leadership,
lean construction,
LEED,
Lessons Learned,
Lessons learned;Retrospective,
Managing for Stakeholders,
managing stakeholders as clients,
Mentoring,
Mentoring,
Mentoring,
Mentoring,
Mentoring,
Methodology,
Metrics,
Micromanagement,
Microsoft Project PPM,
Motivation,
Negotiation,
Neuroscience,
neuroscience,
New Practitioners,
Nontraditional Project Management,
OKR,
Online Learning,
opportunity,
Organizational Culture,
Organizational Project Management,
Pandemic,
People management,
Planing,
planning,
PM & the Economy,
PM History,
PM Think About It,
PMBOK Guide,
PMI,
PMI EMEA 2018,
PMI EMEA Congress 2017,
PMI EMEA Congress 2019,
PMI Global Conference 2017,
PMI Global Conference 2018,
PMI Global Conference 2019,
PMI Global Congress 2010 - North America,
PMI Global Congress 2011 - EMEA,
PMI Global Congress 2011 - North America,
PMI Global Congress 2012 - EMEA,
PMI Global Congress 2012 - North America,
PMI Global Congress 2013 - EMEA,
PMI Global Congress 2013 - North America,
PMI Global Congress 2014 - EMEA,
PMI Global Congress 2014 - North America,
PMI GLobal Congress EMEA 2018,
PMI PMO Symposium 2012,
PMI PMO Symposium 2013,
PMI PMO Symposium 2015,
PMI PMO Symposium 2016,
PMI PMO Symposium 2017,
PMI PMO Symposium 2018,
PMI Pulse of the Profession,
PMO,
PMO,
pmo,
PMO Project Management Office,
portfolio,
Portfolio Management,
Portfolio Management,
portfolio management,
presentations,
Priorities,
Probability,
Problem Structuring Methods,
Process,
Procurement Management,
profess,
Program Management,
project,
Project Delivery,
Project Dependencies,
Project Failure,
project failure,
Project Leadership,
Project Management,
project management,
project management office,
Project Planning,
project planning,
Project Requirements,
Project Success,
Ransomware,
Reflections on the PM Life,
Remote,
Remote Work,
Requirements Management,
Research Conference 2010,
Researching the Value of Project Management,
Resiliency,
Risk Management,
Risk Management,
Risk management,
risk management,
ROI,
Roundtable,
Salary Survey,
Schedule Management,
Scheduling,
Scope Management,
Scrum,
search,
SelfLeadership,
SelfLeadership,
SelfLeadership,
SelfLeadership,
SelfLeadership,
Servant Leadership,
Sharing Knowledge,
Sharing Knowledge,
Sharing Knowledge,
Sharing Knowledge,
Sharing Knowledge,
Social Responsibility,
Sponsorship,
Stakeholder Management,
Stakeholder Management,
stakeholder management,
Strategy,
Strategy,
swot,
Talent Management,
Talent Management,
Talent Management,
Talent Management,
Talent Management,
Talent Management Leadership SelfLeadership Collaboration Communication,
Taskforce,
Teams,
Teams in Agile,
Teams in Agile,
teamwork,
Tech,
Technical Debt,
Technology,
TED Talks,
The Project Economy,
Timeline,
Tools,
tools,
Transformation,
transformation,
Transition,
Trust,
Value,
Vertical Development,
Volunteering,
Volunteering #Leadership #SelfLeadership,
Volunteering Sharing Knowledge Leadership SelfLeadership Collaboration Trust,
VUCA,
Women in PM,
Women in Project Management
Date
Your ability to contribute to a project team depends a lot on your ability to relate to people -- your team members, stakeholders, managers. While positive and supportive relationships can propel you to success, dysfunctional relationships can destroy you.
If you mismanage a dysfunctional relationship with a difficult person, the fallout will affect your productivity and, quite possibly, the fate of your project.
The first step is to identify whether you're in a toxic professional relationship. Here are some signs to look for in the other person; he/she:
- Stifles your talent and limits your opportunities for advancement
- Twists circumstances and conversations to their benefit
- Punishes you for a mistake rather than help you correct it
- Reminds you constantly or publicly of a disappointing experience or unmet expectation
- Takes credit or withholds recognition for new ideas and extra effort
- Focuses solely on meeting their goals and does so at your expense
- Fails to respect your need for personal space and time
To successfully manage difficult people, you need to set boundaries that encourage mutual respect and keep the focus on productivity. Boundaries remind people of what's acceptable to you and what's reasonable to expect from you, and prevent difficult people from taking up too much of your time and energy. Failure to set these boundaries simply allows a toxic relationship to develop.
Establishing boundaries isn't easy, however. Difficult people don't like boundaries. They want to shift responsibilities according to their mood and create work environments that mirror their personal environments.
Here are some ways you can set boundaries:
- Manage your time. Set a limit on the amount of time you spend beyond the hours needed to complete the project work. For example, you should politely but firmly decline an invitation to a peripheral meeting.
- Express yourself. Reveal aspects of your personality that reinforce your values. Sometimes it's a matter of letting people in a little bit to help keep your boundaries intact. If aggressive behavior offends you, say so (in a firm, but non-aggressive way), but you also need to consistently act in an assertive (rather than aggressive) way.
- Build your reputation, and do it carefully and consistently. Everyone plays a role at work. Your co-workers should know what you stand for and what to expect from you. Then, don't waiver. Authenticity is the key -- behave in the way you expect others to treat you.
- Change the conversation. Stay focused on the project and away from nonproductive behavior. Avoid gossip, criticism and other negative conversations by simply stating: "I don't really have time to discuss that just now, but I really do need your input on this project issue." If the attack is on you personally, ask to "take the conversation off line and focus on this important project matter now."
Effective relationship management is not for the faint-hearted. But when you know how to handle difficult relationships appropriately, you'll be in a much stronger position to achieve your objectives and succeed.
How do you manage difficult people? What advice would you give for establishing boundaries?
Posted
by
Lynda Bourne
on: December 06, 2013 01:16 PM |
Permalink
