Project Management

When Drive and Assertion Can Get You Into Trouble

From the An Influential Project Manager Blog
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Some project managers are very assertive. They are in a hurry, focused on the deliverable, and nothing is going to stand in their way. They have a reputation to maintain.

But, what does this mean? How do you quantify very? More to the point, how do those you work with judge your level of drive and assertion?

You need to know, or at least begin to get a sense of what level to apply, in case you go too far (and be accused of bullying) or become too soft (and be accused of not delivering).

Here are some behavioural that some regard to be bullying:

  • Interrupting and talking over other people.
  • Demanding things at short notice.
  • Not listening to others’ ideas and suggestions.
  • Publicly favouring or disfavouring individuals.
  • Being intolerant of fools.
  • Reacting aggressively when challenged.
  • Speaking before thinking and upsetting people.
  • Allowing others to take unfair responsibility for problems.
  • Cancelling meetings at short notice.
  • Telling people what to do and how to do it.

(extract from Are You a Bully?)

Any one of these, in isolation, it probably okay. Not ideal, but okay. When you start adding more to the mix, you are likely to be coming across as too pushy, demanding and perhaps a bit of a bully.

Now, I know you have a job to do, and there are far too many people avoiding a good day’s work, but take this seriously, before it becomes a problem for you.

How do you judge the appropriate level of assertion to apply?

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Posted on: August 30, 2019 07:00 AM | Permalink

Comments (9)

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Eduin Fernando Valdes Alvarado Project Manager| F y F Fabricamos Futuro Villavicencio, Meta, Colombia
Very interesting, thanks for sharing

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Kimberly Chavez Platform Program Manager, Integration| Brightspeed Overland Park, Ks, United States
Asking for feedback from the team is important. Everyone brings some level of expertise to the mix, that is why they are there. Capitalize on that, it will only benefit the project in the end. Good reminder, thank you for posting.

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LORI WILSON RETIRED - Technical Project Manager| RETIRED - LifePoint Health Clarkston, Wa, United States
These are good reminders for sure!

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Maya Kalach Head of PMO, IT| Middle East Airlines Beirut, Lebanon
food for thought

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Rami Kaibni
Community Champion
Senior Projects Manager | Field & Marten Associates New Westminster, British Columbia, Canada
Good Points Collin - These happen on a daily basis and there should be a constant reminder of how much detrimental they can be to the person himself and the working environment,

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Alok Priyadarshi Project Manager| Tata Consulting Engineers Limited Jamshedpur, Jharkhand, India
Insightful. There is very thin line between assertiveness and bullying and these gap can can be widened by applying empathy suitably in situations. Thank you Colin for sharing great article.

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Colin Gautrey Author, Executive Coach and Trainer| The Gautrey Group United Kingdom
Thin line indeed Alok. Many perspectives. There is a thin line dividing assertiveness and aggressiveness. How that is perceived may be as demanding or bullying - which depends on the recipients disposition, background, experience, etc. So exactly the same behaviour can have different effects on different people. And even things like the timing/environment can also lead to a different effect on the same people!! That's what makes this very tricky indeed - or is that fascinating??

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Suzi MS United Kingdom
Fantastic reminder thank you for sharing.

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Collins Aluga Quantity Surveyor| MCK Contract Services Ltd Nairobi, Nairobi, Kenya
Good checklist.Thanks

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