I Can Hear You
From the Be Good to Yourself Blog
by Angela Even
This blog is about caring for your most valuable asset: you. You cannot provide value to anyone if you are not operating at peak performance, so your most successful project should be you. I will uncover key leadership techniques, recommendations and theories related to working remotely and improving employee outcomes. Topics will include self-management, self-awareness and self-care, along with emotional intelligence, empathy, collaboration, relationship building, establishing trust, mental health awareness, remote work and e-leadership.
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Even the strongest person can find themselves in the middle of a situation or an event that their mind, heart, or body is not equipped to deal with. If you throw on some stress, a breakup, a demanding boss or client, and some financial issues, you can quickly end up in the middle of the perfect storm. Events can feel like they were lined up in a path aimed directly at you and sent to break you and tear you apart inch by inch. Eventually, you do not even recognize yourself, and you cannot even remember, much less concentrate on the people around you or the people that love you. We do not always make the best decisions with a mind this hurt, lonely, and clouded. We end up making decisions that, at that moment, we believe might end the pain.
I have heard it said that people that take their life are selfish, and I’m afraid I have to disagree. It reminds me of the saying that if you know, you know, and you don’t, you don’t. You cannot imagine what someone is thinking at that moment that their soul hurts so badly that they want it to stop existing or at the moment that they had finally gotten so lonely that no life seemed better than this one.
I am not glorifying the act or the event. I am merely trying to bring light and understanding into the events that may lead someone to this hell. It is almost as if you have gone blind and can no longer see anyone, and they definitely cannot see themselves.
Just a short time ago, a beautiful young man found himself at this very point. No one saw it coming, and no one heard the cries. It was not that they were not listening; it was just that this sweet boy had not yet cried out loud enough for them to hear him. His pain was as deep and real as the scars that it has left on his mother, father, and siblings. This young man would be 18 years old today, yet the birthday celebration for a beloved son will happen without their beloved son.
For this kind-hearted, funny, and spirited young man, I would like to challenge everyone to listen closely, watch intently, and reach out to anyone that may not have found the voice that will allow them to cry loud enough to be heard.
-te amo mi dulce bebe
https://www.nimh.nih.gov/
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
#BeThe1Who
Posted on: March 24, 2022 01:04 AM |
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Comments (5)
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Luis Branco
CEO| Business Insight, Consultores de Gestão, Ldª
Carcavelos, Lisboa, Portugal
Dear Angela
The story you told us is very sad...
What could have been done, in your opinion, to avoid such a catastrophe?
Sir,
It is unfortunate, but it is not my intent to make anyone sad. I intend to bring awareness and discussion around the topic. First, we need to extinguish the old attitudes and myths around the subject.
1. It is for attention; they will not do it.
2. Call their bluff, tell them to do it.
3. It is an act of selfishness, and they will not do it because of their loved ones.
These outdated attitudes cause bystanders not to act.
Another solution could be that school, police, teachers, anyone involved with the care or charge of others be trained to listen and believe. Believe a woman that says she is abused, believe a teen that says they are being bullied, consider a child that says they are being abused. Stop victim shaming.
Finally, it comes down to listening and noticing when someone you see regularly may be acting out of character. If we can remove the stigma and embarrassment, people may not hide their feelings.
What do you think needs to happen, Luis?
-Angie
I remember a lecturer saying that if management don't back you up, or support you in any meaningful way, leave. Because they're not going to get any better and they'll drag you down. Having learned the hard way, I screen companies very closely for cultural values, work-life balance. If I see flags like "fast-paced multitasker" (or sthg to that effect), I don't go near them because I know that doesn't work for me.
Justin Fu
Senior Systems Engineer| Parsons
Bristow, Va, United States
That's powerful, thanks for sharing
Stéphane Parent
Self Employed / Semi-retired| Leader Maker
Prince Edward Island, Canada
It's so easy to be wrapped up in our own world. Thank you for reminding us to stay alert to those around us who are hurting.
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