A Tale of Two Friends
From the Ethics Bistro Blog
by Tara Leparulo,
Shenila Shahabuddin, Juan Posada Toro, Albert Agbemenu, Ming Yeung, Kannan Ganesan, Yannick Arekion, Witold Hendrysiak, Stelian ROMAN, Laszlo J. Kremmer MBA, CSPO®, CSM®, PMP®
We all tackle ethical dilemmas. Wrong decisions can break careers. Which are the key challenges faced? What are some likely solutions? Where can we find effective tools? Who can apply these and why? Dry, theoretical discussions don't help. Join us for lively, light conversations to learn, share and grow!
View Posts By:
Tara Leparulo
Shenila Shahabuddin
Juan Posada Toro
Albert Agbemenu
Ming Yeung
Kannan Ganesan
Yannick Arekion
Witold Hendrysiak
Stelian ROMAN
Laszlo J. Kremmer MBA, CSPO®, CSM®, PMP®
Past Contributors:
Dr. Deepa Bhide
Lily Murariu
Alankar Karpe
Bryan Shelby
Amany Nuseibeh
Mohamed Hassan
Fabio Rigamonti
Simona Bonghez
John Watson
Lissa Muncer
Valerie Denney
Majeed Hosseiney
Gretta Kelzi
Enrique Cappella
Rocio Briceno
Karthik Ramamurthy
Recent Posts
Behind closed doors: When decisions feel already made
Looking for the most important information on pmi.org? Here are the key links.
Navigating AI in Project Management: A Comparison with Racing Co-Pilots and Driverless Cars
Values and Ethics in Fintech: A 2026 Reflection on Integrity, Accountability, and Ethical Vigilance
Cultural Shift: Artificial Intelligence, Machine Learning, and Project Practice
Categories
Aerospace and Defense,
Agile,
AI,
Ambassadors,
Artificial Intelligence,
Ask the Experts,
Behavior,
bottom line,
Business Acumen,
Business Ethics,
Business Ethics,
CEO,
CFO,
Change Management,
Chapters,
CIO,
code of conduct,
code of ethics,
Code of Ethics and Professional Conduct,
communication,
Conflict,
Construction,
courage honesty responsibility respect fairness,
Cultural Diversity,
Culture,
CxO,
Decision Making,
Decision-making,
Decision-making,
Digital Project Management,
Digital Transformation,
Diversity,
Do the right thing,
dugutalization project manager professionalism social media,
economy,
EDMF,
EMAG,
empathy,
Ethical Dilemma,
Ethical Leadership,
Ethics,
Ethics,
Ethics,
Ethics,
Ethics,
Ethics,
Ethics,
Ethics as a competence,
Ethics Bistro,
Ethics in Communication,
Ethics Insight Team,
Fairness,
fairness,
Governance,
Honesty,
honesty,
Human,
Information Technology,
Leadership,
Legal Project Management,
Legilsation,
Lessons Learned,
Negotiation,
Nexus,
Organizational Culture,
Organizational Project Management,
PMI Program Management,
PMI Talent Triangle,
PMIAA,
Portfolio Management,
Power Skills,
practitioner,
Product Management,
Professional Conduct,
professional conduct,
Professional Responsibility,
Professionalization,
professonal conduct,
Program Management,
Project,
Project Management,
project manager,
Regulatory,
research,
Respect,
respect,
Responsibility,
responsibility,
Risk Management,
Stakeholder Management,
Strategy,
Sustainability,
Team Assessment,
Teams,
Thought leadership,
tools,
Trust,
trust,
Values,
Values,
values,
Virtual Experience Series,
volunteers,
Ways of Working
Date
Julio and Martin were best friends in graduate school. Since then, their careers had taken them to many cities around the world. They now worked in the same city and shared the same profession, project management.
The duo would often meet for lunch every few weeks at their favorite Italian bistro. Over these lunches, they readily shared their personal and work experiences.
This week, Julio sensed that something was bothering Martin. Even over the phone in the past weeks, Martin had not been his cheerful self.
Julio asked, “What’s up buddy? You’ve seemed out of sorts for some time now.”
Martin was indeed troubled and badly wanted to talk. Julio was the one person he could really trust. He said, “You’re right. I’m having a tough time. My customer doesn’t trust me. Even worse, my team members seem to hate me. I’m under attack on several fronts!”

In an empathetic tone, Julio said: “That’s tough. Tell me more.”
“In my latest customer status report, I didn’t disclose a delay with a critical work package. A key AutoCAD expert suddenly fell sick. I didn’t want to panic my customer since I was sure we could catch up before the next report. The status column had a green icon when it should’ve been yellow. The AutoCAD guy didn’t recover in time. The work got further delayed. Someone from my team told the client that I was misrepresenting progress. My customer now questions every minor detail in my reports!”
Martin paused to sip his drink and continued: “I’m terribly understaffed and behind schedule. There’s no option but to drive my team very hard. I’m often rude, sometimes even mean. On Wednesday last week, I overheard two team members say that I was the worst boss they ever had. My woes seem endless!”
Julio realized that the situation was worse than what he had originally assumed. He reassuringly said, “I’d feel the same way if I was in your place. I’m very sure we can work this out.
“You know me. I don’t sermonize, but it’s obvious that you have a serious trust issue with your client. I too have made the same mistakes of reporting inaccurate progress. While each seemed like a small untruth, they soon cascaded and resulted in broken trust.
“I quickly realized that it's better to be completely honest with stakeholders. But don’t just go to them with issues. Explain your plan to get back on track. Believe me: They start to trust and respect you.”
Julio recalled a leadership workshop where the trainer had spoken about the importance of project managers being completely transparent and respectful to all stakeholders. He had referred to PMI’s Code of Ethics and Professional Conduct1 which stressed four important values: responsibility, respect, fairness, and honesty.
“Pushing your team members overly hard plus being rude and mean to them may fetch short-term results. In the long run, many team members may push back or quit. You will lose valuable time in finding and training new personnel.
“Take responsibility for your behavior. Don’t blame the schedule. Invest time in team building. Explain the challenges of your tight schedule and request their help. You’ll get their buy-in and better results!”
Martin thanked Julio for his practical advice.
Now that he had a way out of his troubles, his favorite lasagna seemed to taste so much better!
1 https://www.pmi.org/about/ethics/code
Posted
by
Karthik Ramamurthy
on: August 12, 2018 01:07 AM |
Permalink
Comments (24)
Page: 1 2 <prev
Please login or join to subscribe to this item
Karthik Ramamurthy
Author, Say YES to Project Success| Founder KeyResultz
Chennai, Tamilnadu, Tamilnadu, India
@Vincent Guerard and @Sripriya Narayanasamy: Thanks a ton for reading through this blog post, rating it, and for your kind words.
We will be very grateful to you for helping us spread the Ethics message to your colleagues. One way could be to communicate to them about our rich set of Ethics resources at pmi.org/ethics and this blog.
Karthik Ramamurthy
Author, Say YES to Project Success| Founder KeyResultz
Chennai, Tamilnadu, Tamilnadu, India
@Andrew Craig and @Drake Settsu: Thanks you so very much for reading through this blog post, rating it, and for your kind words.
We will be very grateful to you for helping us spread the Ethics message to your colleagues. One way could be to communicate to them about our rich set of Ethics resources at pmi.org/ethics and this blog.
Karthik Ramamurthy
Author, Say YES to Project Success| Founder KeyResultz
Chennai, Tamilnadu, Tamilnadu, India
@Rami Kaibni and @Tamer Zeyad Sadiq: Thanks a million for reading through this blog post, rating it, and for your kind words.
We will be very grateful to you for helping us spread the Ethics message to your colleagues. One way could be to communicate to them about our rich set of Ethics resources at pmi.org/ethics and this blog.
Vincent Belougne
Consultant, Agile Methodologies| Self-Employed
Petaling Jaya, Selengor, Malaysia
Thanks Karthik,
This is a very nice story on PM ethical reporting/stakeholders communication.
It shows well how a lack of honesty , can drive easily a manager to be unfair and lack respect to his/her constituents. The only way out, is to take responsibility for the miscommunication with the client, and apologise to the team for treating them badly.
And then, avoid doing it again.
Page:
1 2 <
prev Please Login/Register to leave a comment.
|
"There is no shame in not knowing; the shame lies in not finding out."
- Russian proverb
|